"this is what perfection looks like"

This JUST NEVER GETS OLD. (Thanks again to candyboots via tits mcgee's sidebar) I have read these Weight Watchers cards' editorial comments again and again and I never get enough. If you are having a bad day, just read on. It could always be worse. You could have to eat this food for lunch. And you will laugh until you cry. Or cry until you laugh.

a day in the life of a four year old

A four year old's work day and blind date...

infectious toy shopping

These plush microbes are the perfect baby shower gift.

more toy shopping

For some reason my younger sister and I have always found the word zamboni hilarious. So when I saw this toy zamboni it made me smile.

pamphlets!

I love pamphlets. I love the history of the pamphlet and the portability of the pamphlet. So what better category of writing than the pamphlet to introduce to my loyal reader the new Rainbow Bookstore web site complete with online ordering, my favorite way to be a capitalist consumer.

embracing the automobile

I was doing a little online toy shopping and came across the "expressway play set". This would go well with the "city council meeting where the residents ask not to have an expressway built through their neighborhood" play set.

racism is bad for babies

There appears to be a connection between racism and the incidence of low birth weight and/or prematurity.

watch the daily show tonight

Our very own Senator Russ Feingold is going to be on the Daily Show tonight, so tune in. On a side note, I keep hoping they will interview my congresswoman on the Colbert Report's "Better Know A District" segment.

UPDATE: Russ was so folksy and cute last night I wanted to scratch his tummy. Who's the next widdle Pwesident of the United States of Amewica? YOU ARE! I love him!

vote joe for late night

I used to be in a model rocket club with this nice young man. Then he got all famous and moved to New York. Now he wants YOUR VOTE to be the next host of Late Night when Conan takes over for Jay Leno.

more crap from the internets

Pumpernickel loaf is a belt buckle that can only be operated by a trained professional and works at any altitude.

good time waster (via adorablog)

Make-a-flake is downright hypnotizing. The little scissors make a satisfying little "snip" sound when you snip the virtual paper. Based on some of the extremely detailed examples you can find in the gallery, I would say it's also highly addictive. Nothing says "late winter" like sitting by a warm fire in my freshly ironed fleece sweat slacks with four bottles of wine, fake crafts and the glow of the laptop.

today's quiz: you should go take it right now because it only has five questions

If Your Life Was a Movie, What Genre Would It Be?

The Movie Of Your Life Is An Indie Flick

You do things your own way - and it's made for colorful times. Your life hasn't turned out how anyone expected, thank goodness! Your best movie matches: Clerks, Garden State, Napoleon Dynamite.

I saw this quiz on a friend's blog and, like his result, mine is no surprise, "THANK GOODNESS." What is especially amusing is remembering playing the "If this party were a movie who would play you?" game at a party at Basford's with G and others, who agreed I would be some obnoxious mixture of Parker Posey and Janeane Garofalo. (Note: G's blog is password protected due to a serious but soon to be remedied flaw in his geography. If you are curious enough to e-mail me I will send you the password.)

sunday night

Hoo boy! How does Andy Rooney keep it so fresh? How does he do it week after week?

if you hate cute babies, then skip this one

Here is a video of a cute baby singing via Adorablog.

you'll never believe this

So I was roller-skating down the street the other day, listening to my Walkman(R) and eating a jar of peanut butter with a spoon, like I do ALL THE TIME, and this dude just steps right in front of me. We totally collide and his chocolate bar of all things ends up right in my jar of peanut butter - RIGHT IN THE MIDDLE OF IT. The worst part, however, is that he was wearing cowboy boots with satin running shorts. Give me a break. Well, I skated away as fast as I could with the dude's chocolate bar still sticking out of my jar of peanut butter and then I threw the whole thing in the first trash can I could find. Who knows where that chocolate had been.

care instructions

I was just doing some laundry and happened to notice that my old navy fleece sweat pants have care instructions--which is silly enough on its own--and they say: DO NOT IRON.

they up and gone done it

[wincing] Aaah shit. The Wisconsin State Legislature passed the constitutional amendment to ban gay marriage and civil unions, so now it's official: this issue will go to a state wide referendum in November. Please give some money or volunteer or sign the petition or anything to help defeat the referendum. Spread the word. I don't even have anything sarcastic to say here. Well, except that it's not about box turtles.